Blog

How narcissistic parenting affects their children

The child will not feel like they are seen or heard because they will only be permitted to do what ...
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Do narcissists have a heart?

The answer to “do narcissists have a heart?” is tragically a resounding NO.  They are what we would call skin ...
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Female narcissists

Female narcissists are dangerous because their manipulation is frequently not recognised for what it is.  Manipulation can come in many ...
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Winning

What winning means to a narcissist   As I have mentioned in previous articles narcissists always “play” to win, there ...
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Traits that some parents have that helps to create narcissists/sociopaths:

The traits that are listed below are just some of the influencing factors, each child in a family will have ...
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Bullies

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” One ...
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Coercive abuse

  How to RecognizeCoercive Control   Coercive control is a form of ongoing bullying and terrorism used to instill fear/insecurity ...
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Narcissistic parents

Traits of narcissistic parents Completely self-absorbed Emotionally unavailable Extremely negative Completely unable to celebrate the accomplishments of their children Unable ...
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Quotations

Quotes about narcissism “Narcissism has more in common with self-hatred than with self-admiration.” — Christopher Lasch, author “Half the harm ...
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Sons of narcissistic fathers

Sons of narcissistic fathers Narcissistic fathers are as toxic to their sons as narcissistic mothers are to their daughters. Since narcissistic ...
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Boundaries

How to create and maintain boundaries   Abuse is all about gaining control and power of a victim.  It is ...
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Narcissistic parents and their children’s relationships

Narcissistic parents will interfere with all of their children’s relationships.  Those will include: Relationships between siblings (triangulation) and setting one ...
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Overt traits of covert narcissists

They are extremely judgmental of others.  This is because they have so many insecurities they are hyper critical of those ...
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Controlling people

Controlling people   Controlling people are very keen on telling others who they are, what they are, what they are ...
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Narcissism and suicidal feelings

If you come from a narcissistic family of origin or have had a narcissistic partner, suicidal feelings are “normal”.  This ...
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Narcissism and suicidal feelings

If you come from a narcissistic family of origin or have had a narcissistic partner, suicidal feelings are “normal”.  This ...
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Holding space for someone

When we hold space for others it means that we empathise that we can feel other people’s pain where ever ...
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Signs you have been abused or are being abused by a narcissist

Signs that you have been abused or are being abused by a Narcissist: You are unsure of yourself.  Do you ...
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Loneliness

  Feeling of loneliness after no contact or even while you are still in a relationship with a narcissist can ...
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Sibling bullying

Being bullied, humiliated and treated with distain and contempt is much more than sibling rivalry Sibling bullying is an integral ...
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Children of narcissistic parents

If you are a child of narcissistic parents growing up was never loving, supportive, fun, relaxing or safe.  Since narcissists ...
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Talking to children

Most parents know that talking to their children is vital for their emotional and intellectual development, however, there are very ...
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Projection

One of the most difficult things to understand in a relationship with a narcissist is their projection of their own ...
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Intimacy with a partner

Intimacy with a narcissist Narcissists prefer second hand relationships, where they can feign intimacy with another person because they have ...
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Sex with a narcissist

Sex with a narcissist Sex with a narcissist is a very “strange” experience.  Narcissists are as true to their disorder ...
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Arguing with a narcissist

When arguing with narcissist it is important to know that you will never “win”, they will argue in an incoherent ...
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Narcissistic Rage

Narcissistic rage is a manipulation tool that is used by narcissists to frighten, silence, hurt or break their “opponent”.  It ...
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Contents

50 traits of narcs About us Abuse Abusers Characteristics Acronyms in narcissistic literature All  dysfunctional families are alike Authentic Vs ...
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Toxic Love

Toxic Love The main qualities of all toxic people are that they are: Very judgmental of others and have little ...
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Love Bombing

Love bombing is a term that was invented to describe how narcissists lure their potential target into their narcissistic orbit, ...
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Narcissistic Hallmarks

Constant weird lies, a narcissist will lie even when the truth would serve them better Narcissistic rage, they will get ...
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Emotionally unavailable people

  “Your truest friends are the ones who will stand by you in your darkest moments – because they’re willing ...
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Body Language

An overt narcissist will have a tendency to have haughty arrogant postures.  For example, the male narcissist might walk down ...
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Unhealthy parenting

Healthy parenting Parenting starts before babies are even born, with regard to diet, having healthy life style and generally taking ...
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FOG Fear, Obligation Guilt

Emotional blackmail is one of the narcissists favourite forms of manipulation.  FOG stands for Fear, Obligation and Guilt, they use ...
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Lazy Parasites

Narcissists are notoriously lazy in practically everything that they do (unless they feel like they have a worthy audience or ...
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Narcissistic Fathers

It is fair to say that most narcissistic fathers have less impact on their children than narcissistic mothers do.  That ...
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Good Child Syndrome

A lot of us have “Good child syndrome”, I made the phrase up (I thin), what I mean by it ...
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Criticism

No one likes criticism, it is part of human nature, sometimes even constructive criticism can cause us to feel defensive.  ...
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No Contact

No contact is the only route for some people to take after being in a relationship with a narcissist, whether ...
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Critical Thinking

Wikipedia states that: Critical thinking, also called critical analysis, is clear, rational thinking involving critique. Its details vary amongst those ...
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Healthy communication

There are loads of different communication styles.  There is no right way or wrong way.   However, there are healthy ways ...
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Emotional Abuse

Every time you are devalued by them, it is designed to make them feel better about themselves at your expense ...
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Golden Child

The narcissistic parent(s) have one or more favourites in their family unit and these are called the golden child(ren).  This ...
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Institutional Grooming

Grooming is when a narcissist goes on a publicity campaign to promote themselves as a lovely person, rational, fair and ...
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Grey Rock

Grey Rock is a technique that can be used to stay neutral and unemotional in the presence of a narcissist ...
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Giving and receiving

Narcissists have three main currencies that they value and they are: Control Power Money (and other resources) Things like: Empathy ...
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Trying to play nice

They are completely disinterested in what is going on in your life, they don’t ask questions about you (or your ...
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The look and feel of abuse

Questions to ask yourself: How do you feel when you are around the other person? Do you feel uncomfortable around ...
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Integrity

Narcissist’s actions rarely match their words, they are inconsistent and change their minds, opinions and dreams/desires on a regular basis.  ...
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The wounds that are inflicted through a narcissistic family dynamic

Many people who have grown up in a narcissistic family fully understand how the core wounds that are inflicted manifest ...
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Misogyny and Misandry

Wikipedia states that Misogyny means: Misogyny (/mɪˈsɒdʒɪni/) is the hatred or dislike of women or girls. Misogyny can be manifested ...
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Narcissists and the happiness of others

Narcissists do not like to see other people being happy, they have a pathological envy towards people are happy because ...
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Narcissists are attracted to empaths

Narcissists are attracted to Empaths Narcissists are holding on to some emotional childhood trauma that they have not healed, as ...
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Morality

Morality to a narcissist is a code of ethics that they want others to employ when dealing with them.  It ...
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Bad babies

Narcissistic mothers can label their babies as being “bad”.  The reason for this is because the narcissistic mother will not ...
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Signs that you have been abused or are being abused by a Narcissist

You are unsure of yourself.  Do you find it difficult to make decisions?  Constantly refer to other people for validation ...
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Scapegoat

The opposite to the golden child is the scapegoat.  Scapegoating is a serious dysfunctional family problem.  It is when one ...
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What to expect when you erect boundaries with a narcissist

They ignore your request to assert your boundaries, either by pretending not to have heard you or pretending to misunderstand ...
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Narcissists form of “LOVE”

I love the way you make me feel about myself. I love the way that you want to take care ...
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What narcissists what they say vs what they mean

“Think of the children” = Think of me “You are so selfish” = You are not giving me enough attention, ...
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Not everyone has a conscience and the ability to empathise

There is a common myth that everyone has a conscience and the ability to empathise.  This is not the case ...
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Parental Wounds

Our Parental Wounds are traumas that have been chugging down the line through the generations for a very long time ...
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Gaslighting

Gas lighting is when an abusive person tries to shift your perception of events so that they can undermine your ...
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Most commonly found acronyms in literature about narcissism

  ASPD – Antisocial personality disorder BPD – Borderline personality disorder CBT – Cognitive behavioural therapy C-PTSD – Complex post-traumatic ...
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Boredom, drama and self-deception

The narcissist’s brain served human kind well in the long distant past.  It is completely selfish, reactive and lives in ...
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Passive aggressive behaviour

Passive aggressive behaviour is frequently misunderstood.  What it is, is indirect anger.  The person is unable to acknowledge to themselves ...
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Family System

A narcissistic family is a bit like being brought up in a war zone.  The narcissistic parent(s) have all of ...
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Parental Alienation

There are varying degrees of parental alienation when separating from a narcissist.  The most extreme cases are absolutely ruthless in ...
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Feelings and emotion words

Pleasant Feelings OPEN HAPPY ALIVE GOOD understanding great Playful calm confident gay courageous peaceful reliable joyous energetic at ease easy ...
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Some very obvious signs of narcissism

 They are very controlling, they like to control the people around them, their partners, friends and colleagues They do this ...
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Main fears of a narcissist

Fear of abandonment, being over looked or neglected. Fear of loss of control/being out of their comfort zone Fear of ...
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Where abuse by females is different

It is reckoned in that one in three abuse victims are males, this figure as quoted in HelpGuide.org strongly contradicts ...
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Why narcissists are like young children

Like toddlers, narcissists tend to have very rapid mood swings, the most notable of these swings is when they fly ...
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Description words for narcissists

NARCISSISTS ARE Aggressive Agitated Angry Antagonistic Argumentative Arrogant Authoritative Blames others Bossy Bully Calculating Callous Capricious Cold Competitive Compulsive Conceited ...
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On making mistakes

Narcissists  will expect their targets to apologise for the slightest trifle or indeed things that the narcissist did.  The words ...
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Boundaries

What does the word "boundary" mean to you? Are you like I was and saw boundaries as something that happened ...
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Parentification

Parentification is where one or both parents depend on their child(ren) to provide them with emotional and mental support.  It ...
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Core Beliefs

  Your core beliefs are what you think about yourself and the world around you.  They are the hard drive ...
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Pets

Narcissists see pets, like they see everything, as an extension of themselves.  They like to wear pets as an accessory, ...
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Narcissists do not know you

Narcissists see the world through the only emotions that they can feel which are predominantly anger, frustration, jealousy, envy and ...
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Common Cultural myths

  “We are sitting on top of a vast cultural and historical pyramid of accumulated misconceptions, lies and myths.”  Bryant ...
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Betrayal trauma

If you are involved or have been involved with a narcissist the probability is that you have or will have ...
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Silent Treatment

The silent treatment is a behaviour used by emotionally immature and manipulative people.  It is usually used by narcissists to ...
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Brainwashing children & adults

Children are particularly easy to brainwash because the relationship between parent and child is not one of equals, far from ...
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Secrets

Narcissists are pathologically secretive, they will pass on information on a need to know basis only and will very often ...
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Communication techniques – arguing, conversing talking at people, not listening

"Listening is a form of accepting" Stella Terri Mann Before we realise that we are dealing with a narcissist we ...
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The damaging effects of shame in narcissistic parenting

Shame damages the emotional well-being of the child and the child’s perception of themselves. Shame tells the child “you are ...
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What are the effects of emotional incest on a child?

According to Wikipedia Emotional Incest is a style of parenting in which a parent looks to their child for the ...
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Emotional Rape

According to Wikipedia rape is:   Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse or other forms ...
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Respect for narcissists

We have all been told on a regular basis that we should respect everyone.  The things that these great purveyors ...
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Narcissists Friendship & Loyalty

Did you ever question whether or not a “friend” was actually a friend or did you have a niggling feeling ...
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Narcissists and the outside world

Narcissists do not really relate to the outside world.  They look for supply from the outside but filter all data ...
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Advice for lawyers/mediators about narcissists

There are several key indicators that your client has been abused by a narcissist.  The first one is that they ...
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What is physical abuse when it doesn’t include physical contact?

Physical abuse by a narcissistic parent when there is no physical contact such a hitting or pushing can include: Not ...
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Different types of verbal and nonverbal abuse

Secrecy Secrecy is all about withholding information and a failure to share facts (financial, social and familial),  thoughts (their own ...
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Triangulation

Triangulation is a narcissist’s indirect form of communication where one person (the narcissist) acts as a conduit to prevent direct ...
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Sense of humour and being teased

Narcissists have a very poor sense of humour especially when it comes to themselves.  They take themselves extremely seriously and ...
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The Scorpion and the Frog

One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So ...
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Traits that narcissists look for in their “chosen ones”

 Empathy a narcissist will always be looking for an empathic person. This is because they are easier to manipulate.  It ...
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